╚☆ LOST AND FOUND: Sex, intimacy, you ... and the BunnyRanch

FOREWORD: This post is going to be a little heavier, and deeper, than you're used to seeing from me. It may tug at some sensitive strings, but I think it's important -- and every word is inspired by people I care about in the BunnyRanch community. I hope you find some comfort in it.

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Perhaps you recently got out of a relationship that was less than fulfilling.

Or you’re in one that never was.

Perhaps you’ve been alone for years, divorced or widowed, and have lost touch with your sexual and intimate core -- a part of yourself that’s as natural as the blood coursing through your veins, yet seemingly lifeless.

Perhaps you’ve distanced yourself emotionally, withdrawn socially, given up on the possibility of making a meaningful connection with a woman, cocooned yourself within your own heart -- the only place you find safe anymore.

Perhaps you’ve convinced yourself that the best of times are behind you.

Perhaps you’ve convinced yourself, worse yet, that you don’t deserve happiness, that your own transgressions, whatever they may be, disqualify you from contentedness, from love, from absolution.

Perhaps an ex convinced you of that.

Perhaps she, or he, ripped your heart out, and a piece of your soul went with it.

Perhaps your confidence has taken such a beating, time and time again, that you no longer have the energy to trust in yourself, let alone a woman.

Perhaps you’ve justified your unhappiness, decided you’re simply not worthy: not good-looking enough, not charming enough, not socially skilled enough, not thin enough, not big enough, not healthy enough, not financially stable enough, not this, not that, not the other thing. You've condemned yourself to a life of unrealized potential. Accepted it. You’re so lost in self-pity and self-loathing that you don’t know where excuses end and reality begins.

Perhaps it’s been so long since you touched a woman, touched one that way, that you’ve forgotten how. You’ve forgotten what it feels like, physically and emotionally. You’ve forgotten what a woman tastes like, sounds like, kisses like, smells like, looks like in the throes of genuine passion.

Perhaps you’ve never known, and it’s eating you up inside.

No more!

You are not alone.

You are in control.

You need not succumb to feelings of isolation, of disenchantment, of doubt.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard these stories. How many times I’ve heard, “It’s just not meant to happen for me.”

Everything is meant to happen for you. Everything!

The most personally gratifying thing I can offer you, even beyond toe-curling, mind-blowing sex, is the opportunity to help you see that. Or rediscover it.

I’m not going to sit here and say the BunnyRanch is the answer. I’m not even going to tell you it’s part of the answer. Answers rarely are so clear-cut.

But a visit to the ranch might help you find them. It might help you find yourself. It might be the first step toward a better, happier, healthier lifestyle. You don’t necessarily need a relationship, but you do need to feel desired. You do need intimacy. It can manifest itself sexually, spiritually, psychologically, emotionally. It’s something you at once share and internalize. It’s your lover’s, and it’s yours. It’s a part of your fiber. It’s who you are. It’s who we all are.

What's that, you say? You’re ashamed to seek a professional? You shouldn’t need to?

Phooey. It’s the world’s oldest profession for a reason. People have turned to us since the beginning of time, and will do so until the end. There is no shame in that, no matter what the puritanical forces of American culture might have you believe. And it's indisputably the safest outlet there is.

Don’t be controlled. Don’t be dissuaded. Don’t be disillusioned.

We all need a kick in the pants sometimes. And sometimes we need someone to just rip those pants off and remind us that we’re vital, we’re here, and we won’t always be.

Without judgment. Without inhibition. Without persecution, especially not from within. The worst kind.

You know?

If you don’t, let’s see what we can do about that.

[email protected]

 

Should one need any more motivation to make a journey out to the ranches to see either you or any of the other women there this message should be the icing on the cake so to speek. Much truth in what you say Anna and thank you for saying it so eloquently.

 

Those situations are on point with my current single status all these years though out my life. And what bothers me more is that all my friends in my life have found their level happiness with someone. And I have gotten so close to finding "THE ONE" for example and it never evolves further. From that I build a huge social barrier towards the opposite sex that now friends try to get me to go out with them on double blind dates or just go to clubs to help me find a someone fore me. I always make up excuses to stay home. Its my own fault from low confidence, but when you had all those (Perhaps I quoted) happen to......you really just give up and want to be single the rest of your life. On top of that the embarrassment of still never have been intimate with a woman adds on to that dating pressure for most who are like me. But inside of me I have so much to give and just want to show any woman that I can be a lover, friend, and a companion you can all always count on no matter any circumstance.

Didn't mean to get all serious but that how I feel anyway. :wink:

 

Anna,that is beautifully written.We all have the need to feel desired,the need for intimacy.It's part of human nature to want these things.The sad part is,like you said,too many people give up on living and are just going thru life.I can see where the Bunnyranch,and you especially.have made many people realize that life is meant to be lived.I'm sure many people would say that you helped them realize these things,when it was they themselves just needed to realize them.You are the conduit for their realization.I know that you opened my heart,a heart that I thought was closed off,just by your kindness and generosity to me.You made me feel desired,you shared intimacy with me.You opened my eyes to the fact that the world is a beatiful place,when at times I could not see that.That is why you mean the world to me,and you always will.You will always have a special place in my heart,Anna.So to you,heartfelt thanks.I am the better for knowing you,Anna.The world is a better place because of you.Kisses to you,my sweet angel. Manny

 

VEry well written Anna. I believe that going to the ranch might help give people a boost in there life. I think this will help me get back on the saddle.

 

Anna, How did you get that far inside my head?

 

What a beautiful post. I couldn't agree more!

 

Wow, I just bought wifi service on the plane so I could read the message board. Only to find out that it was blocked for objectionable content. As you can see, I found a way to circumvent big brother. Information is supposed to be free.

I stopped believing in coincidence a long time ago, I've come to realize through meditation, yoga, and positive thinking, that it doesn't exist. There's a reason for everything, matter how small or seemingly insignificant. Life is a series of miracles, it's up to the individual to see them as they are.

A lot of what Anna said, I have expressed to her privately on a personal level, along with more of course from a plethora of gentlemen. No doubt that along with her intellect and educational background are the influencing factors in this post. I'm glad someone finally said it in the open, she really poked the proverbial bear with a stick. I only wish there was a way to really get this message out there so that way men across the planet could benefit from it.

For many years I never trusted my own intuition, and it could he said that I made mistakes. I tend to look at it as a way of life showing me the path and the difference between listening to your heart and your head. My most recent experience of this was that I stayed in a bad relationship because I saw that my mom and my dad who separated when I was young, they are still alone. They are both now senior citizens. I didn't want that to be me, and I let my logic convince me to ignore my heart and stay in an abusive relationship.

Luckily I realized one day that not everything in a relationship can be one persons fault. After all it takes two to tango. I also realized that at the level of consciousness my ex was operating at, she was doing the best she could, and so was I. It was at that point that I started to get an inkling of my addiction to false responsibility. I learned that I am in control, of myself only. I was responsible to myself only. Then I was able to let go of my ex, without anger or resentment and without blame. Don't get me wrong, I still was deeply hurt and it took time and effort to get past that. I did.

This all dovetails with my brother's experience in life, as does our quest for personal truth. We never combined our talents until this past summer, and since then things have gotten overwhelmingly better for us both. We cemented this change at the BunnyRanch, now I've always thought sex was more than physical, in some way it's spiritual expression. I've felt like that with every partner I've had, I've never had meaningless sex.

But until I came to the ranch, I don't think I have ever had truly meaningful sex. It was truly a cosmic experience, one that I will never forget. It was unlike anything I have ever experienced and it's truly indescribable. I had already gotten my kick in the pants, but my ranch experience literally awakened something in me that had been dormant. Something I believed existed, but never achieved while with another human being.

So Laci Ann, Anna, Dennis, and all the Bunnies I have yet to interact with, I thank you for your enlightening and life altering experience. The service you provide operates on a higher level than many of us realize, even if it's in subtle ways.

Best wishes to all!

David

 

What a soul!!!

 

Intamacy is key for great sex!

 

It is indeed, but I think its also key for life I saw that picture, I envy and am very happy for my brother!

 

Meeting Laci Ann was the key to my rejuvenation.

Paris Micheals and Anna Suvari were the icing on the cake

Kisses to all three of you for helping me reconnect with something that was so dormant I feared it was lost.

One of the countless reasons you all hold very special places in my heart

 

I'm hearing so many stories about how people are giving up on discovering, or rediscovering, a satisfying sex life. It makes me ache for them. I want to do whatever I can to help. It doesn't matter how long it's been, how experienced you are ... none of that. It's never too late.

Thanks for commenting.

 

What a fantastic post, Anna. It let's me know you have learned and understood the pain of many of your clients over the years. I feel like much of my life experiences are far from unique after reading this!

 

Very very well written and very poignant Annie.

Might I say that beneath all my facades of false bravedo, of forced emotional detachment and repression, is a really raw and sensitive nerve that this has hit.

Excuse me as I begin to start tearing, but I'll just say, I'm happy to have made a first step, and personally for me, it was a very happy first step in the right direction.

 

Well stated.

Many thanks.

 

Great topic Miss Anna

It's crazy you really don't decide to stop all physical contact with
women for over 8 years. You just build a little wall to protect your feels
and emotions after a messy split ,and then another little wall ..then another

Then you say next year I'll date some but then you think I'm not ready
then you throw yourself into your work...thinking it will help .

Then other relationships in your life are impacted because your only human
You know you need Sex and intimacy ...but you need it on your own terms

Start today bring your self built walls down let the ladies help you

Just don't wait 8 years like I did.

Everybody is wondering what in the hell happen to me (LOL)
at work with my family ...I'm more social

Because when you feel good people can see it (good luck)

 

I had been on a three year hiatus until my trip to the ranch, it took incredible courage on my part to make the commitment to go after having been through hell. Scared, nervous, words can't begin to describe how I felt walking in that door.

I then met my date, Anna. She started talking with me, smiling, I looked into those incredible eyes and it all started melting away. Everything she said in her initial post for this thread goes. Its rejuvenating mentally, emotionally and physically to be with these lovely and caring ladies... make it happen for you!

 

That's nice Anna.
I'm thinking if I print this out and submit it to my insurance co they may consider
a trip to the ranch as therapy and cover it!!
Wouldn't that be sweet.
Dewey

 

This post sums up your huge heart Anna!!!! You Bunnies do such a service to all of us!!!

 

Let me know how that works out for you.

The more i read Anna's writings I am truly in aww. So many people with similar pain. It really makes me wonder what is wrong with us.

 

Superbly written and on point. So true in so many ways.

 

Anna, you hit the nail on the head. IMHO, those who are hit the hardest by that line of thinking are the ones who have never had any sort of relationship. They are rejected again and again and again, which leads them to think that they are unworthy of love. And without outside influence, this mental trap is almost impossible to get out of. It is something that I have a great deal of experience with. I am still stuck there myself. One day I will save up enough money to journey out to the Ranch and lose my virginity. I hope that day comes soon. :cry:

 

Well put "breastlvr", We continue to be of like mind. 8)

After reading Anna's post, I was reminded of an old saying by the German scholar/philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche:
"There are horrible people who, instead of solving a problem, tangle it up and make it harder to solve for anyone who wants to deal with it. Whoever does not know how to hit the nail on the head should be asked not to hit it at all."

Anna, You truly 'hit-the-nail-on-the-head' on more than a few points...
Thank you for expressing yourself so passionately.

 

It makes me so sad when rejection leads to a loss of confidence. Even the BunnyBabes don't bat 1.000 -- every time there's a lineup, all but one lady gets rejected.

One day -- or night -- I hope I can help, sweetie!

 

What a great line! Thank you for your kind words, yacht! Muah!

 

Well said, my friend!

 

You are very welcome! I was happy to have had a part in your "enlightening and life altering experience".

 

Kisses to you!

 

Before meeting the love of life I had more then my share of heart ache Anna, and I only wish there were more souls as kind as yours, may be my heart ache would not have lasted as long. Thank you for this

 

I agree with jere i'm sure any time with you would be life changing for me and I could do with it changing but my trip takes longer to plan But I really am looking foward to meeting you in person already :mrgreen:

 

Beautiful post Anna....it really hit home on a number of points and drives home why you are so special.

 

Hi Anna, you were truly right about this being a "heavier and deeper" post than we're used to seeing here and judging from the responses you've obviously "tugged at some sensitive strings". Not surprising that you have been able to do that from the little bit I know of you. You are definitely a gift and a life changer to many! I appreciate so much you publishing your thoughts, deep or fun or thought provoking, and the hope that you inspire!
Thank You!!

 

The feeling is mutual, piglet!

 

Hope you have as much light in your life as you bring