Blonde on Blonde A blonde was speeding in a 35 mile per hour zone when a local police cruiser pulled her over. The police officer who walked up to the car also happened to be a blonde. She asked for the blonde's driver's license. The driver searched frantically in her purse for a while and finally said to the blonde policewoman, "What does a driver's license look like?' Irritated, the blonde cop said, "You dummy, it's got your picture on it!" The blonde driver frantically searched her purse again and found a small, rectangular mirror down at the bottom. She held it up to her face and said, "Aha! This must be my driver's license", then handed it to the blonde policewoman. The blonde cop looked in the mirror, handed it back to the driver and said, "You're free to go. And, if I had known you were a police officer too, we could have avoided all of this."
I wanted 2 do a quote to save time but this message board is way too wide & 1 4got how 2 move over 2 the end :evil: . I would like 2 know how 2 narrow the board some so I can see the whole replies & get the quote button necessary? I was tryna quote off of stargirl with the brunette jokes. I've heard these in the early 90's. Why do brunettes tell dumb blonde jokes? Because they have nothing better to do on a saturday night. What do you call a brunette in a room full of blondes? Invisible. That's all I can remember of the brunette jokes, still can remember a few dumb blonde jokes. I apologize to them, 3 years ago i've been in a mood for yummy blondes big time How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch n sniff at the bottom of the pool. Why did the blonde get fired at the M & M factory? She kept throwing away all the W's. How do blondes ruin computer screens? They keep using white out when they make mistakes. I couldn't remember how that joke was actually told. How do you teach a blonde math? Add bed, subtract clothes, divide legs. Why did the blonde sell her car? She needed gas $$ :lol: New one upgraded: Why did the blonde rush to get a bowl & a spoon? Because someone said it's chilly[chili] outside. I can't think of anymore right now. I'm better at fat jokes than blonde jokes. Some of the blonde jokes i've heard been already told on here.
Great one :lol: Too bad people don't do that in real life, be that stupid. Referring to people who keep doing murder suicides.
Blondeback Mountain A blonde decides to try horseback riding, despite having had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and the horse immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. In terror, she grabs for the horse's mane, but cannot seem to get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway. The horse gallops along, seemingly oblivious to its slipping rider. Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the horse to try and throw herself to safety. Unfortunately for the blonde, her foot becomes entangled in the stirrup and is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground again and again. Her head is battered against the ground, mere moments away from unconsciousness when... Stan the Walmart manager runs out to shut the horse off. :shock: :lol: :lol:
I found this recently. Q. How did the blonde break her arm raking leaves? A. She fell out of the tree.
A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a new blonde girl painting the walls. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket. Thinking this was a little strange, he asked her why she was wearing them rather than old clothes or an overall. She showed him the instructions on the tin, "For best results, put on two coats".
Not sure if this was told yet, but I remembered this joke yesterday. Why did the blonde sleep with a ruler or tape measure? To see how long she slept.
blonde driving test Why was the blonde upset when she got her Driver's License? Because she got an F in sex.
So Much Snow One winter morning a husband and wife in Denver were listening to the radio during breakfast. They heard the announcer say, "We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even-numbered side of the street, so the snowplows can get through." So the good wife went out and moved her car. A week later while they are eating breakfast again, the radio announcer said, "We are expecting 10 to 12 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the odd-numbered side of the street, so the snowplows can get through." The good wife went out and moved her car again. The next week they are again having breakfast, when the radio announcer says, "We are expecting 12 to 14 inches of snow today. You must park...." Then the electric power went out. The good wife was very upset, and with a worried look on her face she said, "Honey, I don't know what to do. Which side of the street do I need to park on so the snowplows can get through?" With the love and understanding in his voice that all men who are married to blondes exhibit, the husband replied, "Why don't you just leave it in the garage this time?"
