Jade Capri AKA The Brasilian Flamethrower Sooooooo.......when I wrote my first review over a year ago I didn't really think I would have been lucky enough to write many more. I feel fortunate that I was incorrect :wink: . As I write each review, it becomes fairly challenging to come up with something new and fresh without telling details that are too personal in nature. For this review I wanted to focus on how smokin' hot Jade is. We know she is the hottest thing on the planet. But does she have any competition? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Napalm? Greek fire? Molten lava? A steel factory? The surface of the sun? The hottest deserts? Death Valley? Nice try bro! As long as Jade is at the LRN, I think its safe to say the Carson City area will be the hottest place in North America...... :twisted: :roll: -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I believe Jade has virtually unlimited job options due to her amazingly sweet, sexy, and soothing voice. She has conquered the radio waves with her "Pillow Talk" podcasts; and could very well be a hostage negotiator or have countless other professions . But I think that there is another huge opportunity for her. I present you with the "Jade Capri GPS". Living in California, I deal with a buttload of traffic and horrible drivers. I usually end up yelling at people and getting a little carried away. One day I thought, "What if Jade was my GPS?" (Sorry standard GPS lady ; your voice doesn't do it for me anymore ) If I missed a turn, she would say "It's ok honey. Let's just make a u-turn." Disputes on the road? She could calm me down. "Babe! He's not worth it. You are way cuter and a much better driver." Unsafe driving? "Be careful hon! It's not a race." Traffic? "Sweetie the 405 is backed up.......let's take the side streets." I think her voice could reduce road rage and make the streets a little bit safer. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Before meeting Jade this is how I felt. And this is me "post Capri". -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Jade, thank you for being my sexy therapist. I had a lot on my mind and I'm glad I didn't hold anything back. When I told you about the mistakes I had made, I did regret it at first when I saw how disappointed you were. But I soon realized that you were upset because you care about how I am doing and you want me to stay on the right path. I'm glad I shared that even though you weren't very happy with me. :x :shock: I appreciate your patience and understanding about me being a little under the weather. Even though it made things a little tough for me; you showed me your caring side, so it was probably meant to be. I had a great time and you really made some long time fantasies become a reality. 8) Even though we laughed about it, I made you a promise, and I can't wait to keep it. :| :lol: -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- This is what will happen when Jade announces her retirement. I will be passing out the torches..........just kidding!
I know it was a message from your heart and it took a lot of time end effort for you to make this thread, but boy you should be a comedian. I can't stop laughing!!!! You are so funny ATL. More to my response soon. Going to bed now zzzzzzzz EDITED 3/5/14
Please visit us for the "Grand Opening of the Jade Capri Booty Gallery" http://www.bunnyranch.com/chat/viewtopic.php?f=28&t=74228&p=12046033#p12046033 --------------------------------------------------------- and the "Official Jade Capri Fan Club" http://www.bunnyranch.com/chat/viewtopic.php?f=28&t=55253
love the new sig honey! finally get to see that spicy face and love the pic on the far right too. U can even see a slice of ur butt in the mirror
I could send that on the right to you, but now you have moved on, so I will refrain my self from doing it :mrgreen: